Fraud Mutton Enquiry
The lesser known 'Fraud Mutton' enquiry was launched over two months ago to investigate how the case for the 'war against farming', was put to the public, it will soon be publishing its findings.
At the centre of the investigation are the now infamous claims from Information Minister, Ali Mohammed Campbell, that he can single handedly impregnate an entire field of sheep within 45 minutes of an order being issued from Number 10.
"I'll get my shotgun, blow his head clean off his shoulders, the cunt"
Farming leaders and animal rights experts have reacted fiercely, ridiculing the claims, saying it was simply not possible, and Alistair Campbell was just an animal fucking townie pervert.
Herbert McDonald, a rigid opponent of the war against farming is well known for his outspoken views, "Grrrr. Bloody comers-in, messing with our sheep, if I catch the cheeky bugger again, I'll get my shotgun, blow his head clean off his shoulders, the cunt".
One thing is clear, the Government will not be able to bury this scandal as easily as was first thought. Its only hope is to be unequivocally cleared by the results of the Fraud Mutton Enquiry early next week.